{"id":5908,"date":"2012-07-19T16:58:18","date_gmt":"2012-07-19T16:58:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.financial-fluency.co.uk\/?p=5908"},"modified":"2012-07-19T18:07:53","modified_gmt":"2012-07-19T18:07:53","slug":"another-bad-accountant-joke","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.financial-fluency.co.uk\/financial-fluency-blog\/another-bad-accountant-joke\/","title":{"rendered":"Another Bad Accountant Joke"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I received an email today with this headline and I couldn&#8217;t resist opening it!<\/p>\n<p>Here&#8217;s the <em>apparent<\/em> joke:<\/p>\n<p>The Four Immutable Laws of Accounting:<br \/>\n&#8211; Trial balances don\u2019t.<br \/>\n&#8211; Bank reconciliations never do.<br \/>\n&#8211; Working Capital doesn\u2019t.<br \/>\n&#8211; Return on Investments never will.<\/p>\n<p>I can see why they call it &#8220;bad&#8221;. It was a US based book from a company called <a href=\"http:\/\/baystreetgroup.com\/store\/instant-classic-the-accountants-bad-joke-book\/\">Bay Street Group<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Anyway, I thought I&#8217;d see what else was out there and see how big the industry for accountant jokes was:<\/p>\n<p>I only found these two on Amazon UK:<\/p>\n<p><strong>Book 1: The Best Ever Book of Accountant Jokes<\/strong><br \/>\n<iframe src=\"http:\/\/rcm-uk.amazon.co.uk\/e\/cm?t=finanfluen-21&#038;o=2&#038;p=8&#038;l=as1&#038;asins=1466378433&#038;ref=qf_sp_asin_til&#038;fc1=000000&#038;IS2=1&#038;lt1=_blank&#038;m=amazon&#038;lc1=0000FF&#038;bc1=000000&#038;bg1=FFFFFF&#038;f=ifr\" style=\"width:120px;height:240px;\" scrolling=\"no\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" frameborder=\"0\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>Highlighted jokes:<br \/>\nWhy do accountants wear slip-on shoes? You need an IQ of at least 4 to tie a shoelace. <\/p>\n<p>An accountant and his wife were sitting around the breakfast table one lazy Sunday morning.<br \/>\nThe accountant turned to his wife and said: \u201cWhen I die, I want you to sell all my stuff.\u201d<br \/>\n\u201cWhy would you want me to do that?,\u201d asked his wife.<br \/>\n\u201cI figure that you\u2019ll eventually remarry, and I don\u2019t want some asshole using my stuff,\u201d replied the accountant.<br \/>\nThe accountant\u2019s spouse said: \u201cWhat makes you think I\u2019d marry another asshole?\u201d <\/p>\n<p>Did you hear about the accountant who wore two jackets when he painted his house?<br \/>\nThe instructions on the can said: \u201cPut on two coats.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Why do people take an instant dislike to Accountants?<br \/>\nTo save time later.<\/p>\n<p>Why do Auditors make great Accountants?<br \/>\nThey took up space in school.<\/p>\n<p>Do you find these funny? I&#8217;m not too sure how accountant related they are? You could probably replace the word &#8220;accountant&#8221; with the classic English man, Irish Man or Scots man!<\/p>\n<p>I think this is the purpose of the book &#8211; to use typical re-purposed &#8220;victim&#8221; type jokes, although it doesn&#8217;t pretend to be anything else!.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Book 2: What Obama Knows About Accountants<\/strong><br \/>\n<iframe src=\"http:\/\/rcm-uk.amazon.co.uk\/e\/cm?t=finanfluen-21&#038;o=2&#038;p=8&#038;l=as1&#038;asins=B0081IOMJS&#038;ref=qf_sp_asin_til&#038;fc1=000000&#038;IS2=1&#038;lt1=_blank&#038;m=amazon&#038;lc1=0000FF&#038;bc1=000000&#038;bg1=FFFFFF&#038;f=ifr\" style=\"width:120px;height:240px;\" scrolling=\"no\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" frameborder=\"0\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>This book is an attempt at Political humour.<\/p>\n<p>What does Barack Hussein Obama know about accountants? In this book, he explains everything he knows about accountants and he lists all of the new jobs he&#8217;s created for accountants during his administration. Obama then outlines his plan to create more jobs for accountants if he wins this upcoming election in November 2012. All of his words, charts, and graphs included in this book! <\/p>\n<p><strong>Can you do better?<\/strong><br \/>\nI&#8217;d love to hear your accountant jokes &#8211; please feel free to send any using the form below:<br \/>\n<div role=\"form\" class=\"wpcf7\" id=\"wpcf7-f5485-o1\" lang=\"en-US\" dir=\"ltr\">\n<div class=\"screen-reader-response\"><p role=\"status\" aria-live=\"polite\" aria-atomic=\"true\"><\/p> <ul><\/ul><\/div>\n<form action=\"\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5908#wpcf7-f5485-o1\" method=\"post\" class=\"wpcf7-form init\" novalidate=\"novalidate\" data-status=\"init\">\n<div style=\"display: none;\">\n<input type=\"hidden\" name=\"_wpcf7\" value=\"5485\" \/>\n<input type=\"hidden\" name=\"_wpcf7_version\" value=\"5.5.6.1\" \/>\n<input type=\"hidden\" name=\"_wpcf7_locale\" value=\"en_US\" \/>\n<input type=\"hidden\" name=\"_wpcf7_unit_tag\" value=\"wpcf7-f5485-o1\" \/>\n<input type=\"hidden\" name=\"_wpcf7_container_post\" value=\"0\" \/>\n<input type=\"hidden\" name=\"_wpcf7_posted_data_hash\" value=\"\" \/>\n<input type=\"hidden\" name=\"_wpcf7_recaptcha_response\" value=\"\" \/>\n<\/div>\n<p>Your Name (required)<br \/>\n    <span class=\"wpcf7-form-control-wrap your-name\"><input type=\"text\" name=\"your-name\" value=\"\" size=\"40\" class=\"wpcf7-form-control wpcf7-text wpcf7-validates-as-required\" aria-required=\"true\" aria-invalid=\"false\" \/><\/span> <\/p>\n<p>Your Email (required)<br \/>\n    <span class=\"wpcf7-form-control-wrap your-email\"><input type=\"email\" name=\"your-email\" value=\"\" size=\"40\" class=\"wpcf7-form-control wpcf7-text wpcf7-email wpcf7-validates-as-required wpcf7-validates-as-email\" aria-required=\"true\" aria-invalid=\"false\" \/><\/span> <\/p>\n<p>Your Phone Number<br \/>\n    <span class=\"wpcf7-form-control-wrap Contact-phone-number\"><input type=\"text\" name=\"Contact-phone-number\" value=\"\" size=\"40\" class=\"wpcf7-form-control wpcf7-text\" aria-invalid=\"false\" \/><\/span> <\/p>\n<p>Your Message<br \/>\n    <span class=\"wpcf7-form-control-wrap your-message\"><textarea name=\"your-message\" cols=\"32\" rows=\"5\" class=\"wpcf7-form-control wpcf7-textarea\" aria-invalid=\"false\"><\/textarea><\/span> <\/p>\n<p><input type=\"submit\" value=\"Make Enquiry Now\" class=\"wpcf7-form-control has-spinner wpcf7-submit\" \/><\/p>\n<p><small>We value your privacy. We will keep your email address secure and will never send any spam or sell your address to anyone, ever. We will send you information by email of our next and forthcoming courses. You can opt out and unsubscribe any time.<\/small><\/p>\n<div class=\"wpcf7-response-output\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><\/div><\/form><\/div><\/p>\n<p>Stuart Warner, Financial Fluency Ltd<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I received an email today with this headline and I couldn&#8217;t resist opening it! Here&#8217;s the apparent joke: The Four Immutable Laws of Accounting: &#8211; Trial balances don\u2019t. &#8211; Bank reconciliations never do. &#8211; Working Capital doesn\u2019t. &#8211; Return on Investments never will. I can see why they call it &#8220;bad&#8221;. It was a US [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0},"categories":[4],"tags":[78,85],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.financial-fluency.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5908"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.financial-fluency.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.financial-fluency.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.financial-fluency.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/11"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.financial-fluency.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5908"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.financial-fluency.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5908\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5910,"href":"https:\/\/www.financial-fluency.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5908\/revisions\/5910"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.financial-fluency.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5908"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.financial-fluency.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5908"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.financial-fluency.co.uk\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5908"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}